


Poor Albert!

by Miss_Von_Cheese



Series: Sciencegasms [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Multi, Popularization, Science Boyfriends, Theory of Everything, Theory of general relativity, Threesome, quantum physics, science talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-09
Updated: 2014-04-09
Packaged: 2018-01-18 19:22:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1439887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Von_Cheese/pseuds/Miss_Von_Cheese
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When he looked at his boyfriends once again, it was as if they had seen a ghost. They froze, their jaws went slack and Bruce’s glasses almost fell from his nose.</p>
<p>“You actually met Albert Einstein?” Tony exhaled, as if just had an orgasm.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Poor Albert!

Coming back from his usual morning run with Sam, Steve knew exactly where to find his boyfriends: Bruce and Tony were already in their lab -or where they _still_ there? Steve had the feeling they had gotten out of bed way too early this morning, but what could he say? He loved it when they were enthusiastic about their work!

In the elevator he asked Jarvis to warn them, just to make sure he wouldn’t surprise them. He had once tried to bring them breakfast unannounced and Bruce had dropped acid on his own shoe, hulking out in return. Fortunately this time he and Tony were arguing about some test results, and they saw him enter the lab but didn’t interrupt their loud conversation for him.

“I’m telling you, _doctor_ ,” Tony gritted, clenching his jaw, and the official name reflected his anger, “... that this radiation level is too low, you must have made a mistake somewhere!” 

Bruce crossed his arms, adjusted his glasses, visibly annoyed. “I checked three times, Tony, and you know the records are accurate!”

As much as Steve loved to see his boyfriends collaborate, he hated to be in the middle of a geniuses’ fight. He planted a kiss on Bruce’s cheek, then placed a hand on Tony’s tense shoulder and kissed his temple. 

“Gentlemen, how are we doing today?” Steve asked to try lightening up their moods. 

Both scientist sighed and looked at their tablets with small grunts. This was going to be a long day for everyone if they didn’t calm down. He’d better find something else to do, quickly. Taking them out was not an option so Steve sat in a corner of the lab, pulled a tiny Moleskine out of his pocket, and started to sketch out really quickly his handsome boyfriends on the verge of arguing.

After half an hour spent drawing their first wrinkles and scruffy faces, Steve felt they were a bit more relaxed and he could start talking without risking his life. He gave them a shy smile. 

"I love you guys."

Immediately they replied in unison, as if they had practiced. "We love you, Steve." And they kissed the top of his head to apologize for their temper. Sometimes Steve was under the impression they treated him like a little brother, the way they looked at him with touched smiles, how they would pet his neck when they walked by him. But they never were condescending around him, they simply enjoyed his company even if he didn’t understand them, and Steve loved to see them work together, as much as he loved to take them out on dates. 

Their threesome gave Steve a sense of stability, even when one of them was away, the soldier never was alone. And just like Bruce, he had had enough loneliness for a life, a happy relationship was what he needed the most now. 

“Tony, don’t pull this lever, I already told you…” Bruce warned, suddenly tense. 

Tony shook his head, then shrugged with a cocky smile. “Don’t be so careful all the time, I’m telling you this will work!”

“The only thing you’ll do is to wake _him_ up,” Bruce insisted, and Steve knew the situation could quickly get hazardous when they argued while working on Gamma rays. 

Searching for a way to distract his boyfriends, he got up and started to look at the open files on the digital screens. Steve blinked in surprise when he saw a black and white picture of a middle-aged man sticking his tongue out.

“Oh… you guys know Albert?”

Bruce and Tony were staring at each other, each with their hand on a button, ready to press, one to start the experimentation, the other to shut it down immediately. When Steve spoke though, they seemed to remember they couldn’t do everything they wanted, not when their innocent boyfriend was still around. They accepted to take risks, but not if it meant hurting him. 

Steve stared at the picture with an amused smile. It’s only when he looked back at his lovers that he saw their shocked faces, the way they stared at him with open mouths. Tony slowly removed his hand from the lever, almost shaking.

“W-- What do you mean?”

“A-- Albert?” Bruce stammered, so pale that Steve was afraid for a second that he would faint.

“Uh yeah… Albert… uh, what was his name already?” Steve pondered, scratching his forehead. “Doctor Einstein, that’s it. He was quite a celebrity back in the days.”

“You bet,” Tony sighed breathlessly as if it were an evidence. 

Bruce put down his tablet and turned to face Steve, but was unable to form a proper sentence. “Did you... know…” 

“Sure, I met him before I left for Europe. He was a great guy, and a friend of doctor Erskine. Another German scientist who tried to work for the greater good...”

Steve remembered the sadness in the man’s eyes, a guy who wanted to find out the truth about the universe and was tired of all the wars, the way humans treated each other. But when he looked at his boyfriends once again, it was as if they had seen a ghost. They froze, their jaws went slack and Bruce’s glasses almost fell from his nose.

“You actually met Albert Einstein?” Tony exhaled, as if just had an orgasm. 

They both clung to the desk as they sat in front of him and Steve wasn’t really sure what the fuss was about. He shrugged.

“Yeah, you know, it’s kind of his letter to president Roosevelt that started Project Manhattan, he was a really important scientist of our era so… yeah, I met him a few times. He was not fond of the army, so he didn’t approve of me joining them, but he was a good person. We had nice chats during parties, since he was as interested in politics as I was.”

Bruce was chewing his bottom lip, almost green with envy, and Tony rested his chin on his hand with an enamored look. 

“What? What’s going on with you two?” Steve frowned. 

But Tony simply waved his hand. “Tell us more…” 

“More? Well, we met at one of these boring parties, before I left for Europe. He was very smart, you know!” Steve explained, eliciting a soft groan from Bruce. “We talked about many things, about Erskine, about justice and peace, about Germany… he told me about his work too…”

“Oh yeah?” Bruce murmured, almost a moan. “Remember what he said?” 

It took all of Steve’s willpower not to roll his eyes. Of course, it wasn’t as if his serum-enhanced brains could forget anything anyway! “He told me about the years during which he developed his general relativity theory, maybe you’ve heard of it… he was so shocked, he couldn’t believe it was true. It changed the way he saw the universe. For him, the universe was an object responding to physical laws, not just a basic field that contained objects and physical laws. He thought space and time could actually be bent.”

Tony’s breath was short, he was almost panting as he listened religiously. 

“... I know Erskine considered him a genius, as important for mankind as Copernic, Galileo, or Newton were in their time. Albert also told me about quantum theories, and how he didn’t know what to think of them. They were too paradoxical and illogical, he said, but in the meantime they made sense, and that was a big deal for him,” Steve recalled, staring at the wall to gather his memories. “He had developed some kind of fun thought experiment with one of his colleagues, doctor Schrödinger…”

Steve paused for a second when he heard Bruce’s loud gasp. 

“Please, go on,” his lover insisted, licking his bottom lip.

Steve shook his head slightly. He didn’t understand their flushed faces and shiny eyes, they probably knew all of this already, but for once he didn’t feel like he was bothering someone with his old memories. 

“That was an experiment, I don’t exactly recall what it was about, but Albert had talked first about a gunpowder barrel that would be both in an exploded and unexploded state --I know, that sounds crazy, right? Schrödinger’s version contained a cat that was both dead and undead, so obviously this version was more popular.” 

Tony let out a dreamy sigh. Steve had never seen so much admiration in someone’s eyes, except perhaps Coulson’s when he told him about his debuts as Captain America. 

“That was really strange, even after going through everything I had gone through with Howard and Erskine, to have someone telling me that the universe had four dimensions. It’s a bit hard to imagine, right?” Steve smiled. “When I met him he was very lonely, he said about himself that they only took him out of his lab to exhibit him like a curiosity… he disliked these events as much as I did, I’m afraid.”

Now, neither Bruce nor Tony even blinked anymore, too focused on Steve’s words. 

“When I left for Europe, the last time I got to see him, he was working on unifying all fundamental forces into a single theory that would explain everything, according to him… I don’t know if he managed? It must be ancient history by now...” 

With a desperate look, Bruce knitted his brow and softly shook his head. “No, no… there are theories but none has been proved one hundred percent efficient yet. Physicists all around the world are still looking for a Theory of Everything, it has become the Grail of modern physics.” 

“Really? Still no results after seventy years?” Steve pouted, sincerely sorry for the scientist. “Poor Albert! He was a good guy you know, when he heard of Erskine’s death and the pain I had been through, he regretted his letter to Roosevelt…” 

But Tony was already on his feet, throwing himself into Steve’s arms with an admiring sigh. “Oh you, don’t stop talking about science. Tell me more, did you meet other people? Is that all that Einstein told you?”

“Hey, I’m not a scientist, I only gathered what I could understand,” Steve chuckled. “It’s nothing.”

Bruce had to bite his lip not to burst into laughter: only their young boyfriend could say that meeting Einstein was nothing. He almost choked when Steve added, wrapping his other arm around him, “There was this guy too, that Hydra was interested in. His name was Edwin if I remember well, a guy who had his head in the clouds, and maybe further…” 

Steve now had a boyfriend on each arm, they held him with admiring looks and excited grins, having completely forgotten about their tiff. 

“Edwin? Hubble?” Tony bubbled, stroking Steve’s neck. “Oh, you’re so hot when you talk like that…”

Bruce finished his sentence with a low moan. “... please, never stop!”

**Author's Note:**

> I took some liberties with real life events, of course, but the idea was too tempting. I meant no disrespect to actual victims. Also the explanations remain 'relatively' simple but I wanted to emphasize Steve's innocence next to his genius boyfriends. :)


End file.
